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Friendship Made Easy in your 50s

Hey! I'm Janey Carr

...a friendship enthusiast helping single women in their 50s build real friendships for deeper connection, by sharing personal experience, curated expert advice, tips and thoughtful, no-fluff stories delivered to your inbox each week.

Featured Post

My free gift to you !

I've been MIA the past few weeks in case you hadn't noticed. I decided to take a well-deserved two-week, guilt-free holiday 'cos I felt a little burned out. Then, the universe decided to enforce my resolve with two back-to-back head colds, which left me bedridden, doing nothing of any substance, wondering if I had COVID-19. (I didn't.) It was frustrating, but it offered a rare but much-needed rest. It took a while to adjust to being 'unplugged,' but I've developed a taste for it. It was so...

about 1 month ago • 1 min read

It's not that I didn't want to go. The spirit was willing, but the body wasn't feeling it. Even the chance of a cheap, last-minute ticket through a friend wasn't enough to move the needle. But I loathe regret. Judging by the tsunami of Facebook posts the next day, missing Pink in concert would have had me pink with envy. Overwhelmed by decision fatigue, I left it to fate... if the ticket sold on Trade Me, so be it; it wasn't meant to be. And with two hours to go until gates opened, it wasn't...

2 months ago • 1 min read

My energy was zapped as the days puffed into March. All attention was diverted to teenage woes in the home and the necessity of donning my oxygen mask first. As I crashed on the bed that swallowed me whole, feeling delirious from the 4.30 a.m. start to beat the traffic, my reality was stark. I was in desperate need of respite. Running away was not an option, so this was the next best thing. Allowing me to melt into the moment and do nothing else but "be" in a testosterone-free zone. And I...

3 months ago • 2 min read

I observed two young girls who just met become friends on the park swings... "I have a cat named Whiskers" "I have a cat too. He's called Snowball." "Want to draw cats together?" "Yes! We can make a big picture with both our cats." "They can be best friends, just like us." If only making friends was that easy as adults. These days, I can't even fit on the swings. Why is it so hard to make friends as an adult? This is a question I see all the time. It's because once you leave school and enter...

3 months ago • 2 min read

Sometimes, I didn't want to go. I just wanted to stay curled up in bed on those cold winter mornings. But I had a coffee group to host. Organising it was easy; dealing with the persistent nerves about how it would all turn out - not so easy. I was hyper-aware of the many moving parts (invisible to most) - juggling the diverse personalities and dynamics of the group to ensure everyone enjoyed themselves while managing my introverted energy. And so my fear of the outcome never really left. The...

3 months ago • 2 min read

I was on my second rodeo to the UK when, to my relief (and joy), I was invited into the inner sanctum of a large group of ex-pats. Over the years, I'd collected friends from various places: different jobs, travels, parties, and mutual connections. And there were times when I wished we could all merge into one big group so I could hang out with all my favourite people at once. But they were a diverse bunch who didn't always gel. (You know how awkward 21st parties can be). So, at first, having...

3 months ago • 1 min read

The list of friends I want to catch up with has been steadily amassing since December, and I'm failing miserably to just keep up with everyone never mind 'do life' together. It's been a juggling act between school holidays, weekend sporting regattas, family commitments, household chores, and business. And I bet I'm not the only one feeling this way, huh? Honestly, it's been tough balancing everything whilst wrestling with the rising guilt of not spending enough time with new friends -...

4 months ago • 2 min read

My 95-year-old grandmother had been admitted to the hospital the night before with a heart attack. I was on my way to meet my son there. The plan was simple: I'd text him when I was en route so he'd leave school, and we'd arrive together so he wouldn't get lost in a sea of wards. Only I'd left my phone at home - which also happens to be my wallet. (Nice one, Janey. Turn up empty-handed)! I needed to borrow a phone asap to avoid any further fiasco, but the fear of asking a stranger and risking...

4 months ago • 2 min read

Yesterday, I embraced a return to childlike playfulness, spending an afternoon with a friend after a spontaneous invitation to 'scrapbook'. It's not my thing, but I thought, why not?! Try something new, and spend quality time with a friend to boot. As someone who's usually laser-focused on juggling multiple tasks, it was a refreshing change and a rare opportunity to 'just be' without the constant need 'to do'. And it was the perfect chance to deepen a friendship with one-on-one time, a step...

4 months ago • 1 min read

Happy (belated) New Year! We didn't manage to get out and celebrate in the end - torrential rain coupled with my surf-life saver husband involved in the rescue of two young men down at the beach (the third not so lucky, sadly) put a dampener on plans. So... much time for reflection during a sleep-deprived week camping up North with the masses (including the design flaws on our new tent). Looking back at 2023, I unearthed little nuggets of gold amongst the coal that I hadn't stopped to...

5 months ago • 1 min read
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